doctor: what year is this?

doctor: 2005. tell you what. i'll bet you're going to have a great year.

doctor: hey i just met you and this is crazy but you're gonna have a great year first i'm going to set your place of employment on fire then you'll watch me decapitate your boyfriend and his head will melt in my tardis (lol you'll see that soon) and then you'll come away with me, yeah? then i'll take you to see the world EXPLODE BOOM EVERYBODY DEAD ISN'T THIS GR8 ROES ISN'T IT then you'll watch your dad die! three times! he'll come back to life BUT THEN HE KILLS HIMSELF AGAIN DOESN'T THIS SOUND LIKE FUN oh later on i'll die right in front of you (i'm trying not to do that right now beeteedubz) but first you'll absorb a time vortex after i lock you in my box and send you home SO BASICALLY YOU KILL ME YOU SELFISH HUMAN DOESN'T THIS SOUND NICE so then i'll come back to life as a hot guy but not before i lie passed out on your bed for a few hours and then my arm will come off so you'll basically have to save the day but i take all the credit as usual sooooo then you meet my former companion who i abandoned and lol you fight THIS SOUNDS LIKE A BLAST RIGHT oh i leave you for some hot french whore for a little and then you watch your mum-but-not-really turn into a huge metal robot but hey you see your dadOH WAIT HE ISN'T REALLY YOUR DAD ISN'T THAT PEACHY then you lose face--no, literally!--and i turn into a drawing and OH. THIS IS WHERE IT GETS GREAT. i have to close a void, right? but first, I TRICK YOU INTO GOING INTO THE OTHER UNIVERSE! I'M A REALLY GREAT GUY, RIGHT? AND THEN YOU TRY TO COME BACK (AND OH, DO YOU DO THAT A LOT) AND THEN YOU GET SUCKED INTO THE VOID /AGAIN/! and then we're crying and you see a hologram of me and you never get over me and even when you come back 2 years later i send you back AGAIN with my clone who may or may not have dematerialized when i left the universe so really in the end you are sad and alone so ISN'T THAT A GREAT YEAR?

doctor:

doctor:

doctor: so call me maybe